Every factual gag in this duel comes from public reporting:
Google's AI Overviews told users to eat a small rock a day and add non-toxic glue to pizza, pulling from a satirical article and an old forum joke (May 2024) — theregister.com(2024-05-31)
Google's viral image model Nano Banana (officially Gemini 2.5 Flash Image) topped an anonymous testing leaderboard under a joke codename before Google confirmed it (2025) — getimg.ai(2025)
Google launched Gemini 3 on Nov 18 2025, calling it its most capable model with record-setting benchmark scores — en.wikipedia.org(2025-11-18)
A federal court ruled Google would not have to divest Chrome or Android in the search antitrust case, ordering data sharing and a ban on exclusive deals instead (Sept 2 2025) — justice.gov(2025-09-02)
Waymo expanded its driverless robotaxis to Denver, San Diego and Tampa, reaching 14 US cities with a fleet of more than 4,000 vehicles plus freeway rides (Sept 2026) — techcrunch.com(2026-09-01)
The community 'Killed by Google' graveyard tracks 307 discontinued Google products, apps and devices — killedbygoogle.com(2026)
Meta went on an aggressive hiring spree for its new Superintelligence Labs, with reports of nine-figure pay packages to poach AI researchers from rival labs (2025) — techcrunch.com(2025-06-27)
Meta cut about 600 roles from its AI Superintelligence Labs, including its FAIR research unit, even as it kept hiring elite researchers (Oct 2025) — theticker.org(2025-10)
Meta posted top Chatbot Arena (LMArena) scores for Llama 4 using an experimental version tuned for human preference that was not the public release; LMArena updated its rules in response (April 2025) — sherwood.news(2025-04-08)
Meta's Reality Labs metaverse division lost about $19.2 billion in 2025, more than the $17.7 billion it lost in 2024 — gamesbeat.com(2026-01)
Meta unveiled the $799 Ray-Ban Display AI glasses with an EMG Neural Band wristband, shipping Sept 30 2025 — about.fb.com(2025-09-17)
Meta's Ray-Ban Display glasses failed several live demos on stage at Connect 2025, including a video call that would not answer after repeated tries — androidpolice.com(2025-09-17)